Credit card companies love people who make the minimum payment and let the balance go unpaid month after month. And, conversely, credit card companies don’t like you very much if you pay off the entire amount each month—because you’re only making them a little bit of money. Most of these companies make a huge percentage of their profits from interest and various late charges and service fees. As a matter of fact, if you pay your entire balance every month, the credit card companies call you a deadbeat!

Let me illustrate how this works. Suppose you have a credit card balance of $4,000 (that’s only a half or a third of what many families carry), and you decide to pay just the minimum each month. Now let’s assume that your credit card company’s minimum monthly payment is 2 percent. (That’s more than some cards require. But let’s use this figure since the more you pay—the faster it goes away.) At that rate, we’d send in the first monthly payment of $80. Depending on the interest rate and various other details of your contract, some experts estimate that it could take more than thirty years to pay off your $4,000 debt!

One of the most important credit card disciplines is to determine (with no exceptions) to pay every single penny every single month.  Failure to do this means that you will have to do the following:

Get in front of a mirror and have a little 12-Step meeting with yourself.  This is when I look at me in the mirror and I say, “Hi. I’m Steve and I’m a spendaholic!”  Think about it.  Despite what our culture may say, if you are spending money that you don’t have, one of two things is true: you are either a spendaholic—or, you’re a thief!

If you aren’t paying off the full balance every month—get rid of the credit cards!  This means that we must get rid of all the cards. Just like an alcoholic who wants to stop being an alcoholic—you have to stop using credit cards cold turkey!  Remember, part of the strategy for overcoming alcoholism does not include leaving one bottle of vodka on top of the refrigerator—just in case you have an emergency!  Get rid of the credit cards!

I don’t mean to be a killjoy here.  But I am telling you the hard truth. If you can’t (or, won’t) pay off the full amount every month, your life will be much easier without credit cards.  Think about it.

Sadly, my baby boomer generation and those who’ve come after have never mastered some of the finer points of that elder generation’s culture. But I have noticed one not so great tendency common among people from that great generation. Many older adults don’t find it easy to apologize and admit fault — especially to someone who is younger.

I strive to be honest in my writing, so I want to honor that commitment as I share something that I have never written about before. One author, when asked if it was hard to write a book, said, “Not at all. All you have to do is open a vein.” Well, here is where I must pull out a razor and become painfully personal.

My mother was one of the godliest women I have ever known. Before I was born, she quit her job as a teacher to become a 24/7 mom. Some of my earliest memories are of sitting on Mother’s lap as she read us Bible stories. She always put my dad and us children first. She was always at home when I came in from school — with a plate of cookies and an RC Cola. She served everyone she knew.

When we were finally off to college, Mother made food for the lonely, visited the sick, and built a successful Christian pre-school. She was as close to perfect as a mother will ever be. With that said, she had a flaw. Mom could not make herself admit wrong and apologize. Sure, occasionally she would make a sweeping comment like, “Oh, I’m sure I’ve made mistakes.” But I don’t recall a single time when, of her own volition, Mother sat down beside me and simply said, “Steve, I mishandled that situation, and I’m sorry. Will you forgive me?”

I wish she had. It would have improved our relationship tremendously. It would have lessened my adolescent frustration, anger and rebellion. I knew she wasn’t perfect. My dad knew she wasn’t perfect. I imagine she knew she wasn’t perfect. But by not willingly admitting it, resentment grew. To the day of her death, Mother could never bring herself to deal with this problem.

I probably have not been as good a father as she was a mother. But one thing we determined to do early and as often as necessary was to apologize to our children. There have been scores of times over the years when Bon and I messed up with the kids. Often we didn’t realize it until one of them pointed the fact out. And, too frequently, I allowed my pride to dominate. There have been times when I denied my mistake — or got mad at the child who was impertinent enough to make such an observation.

But in most cases, it finally sunk in and I realized I had dropped the ball. I needed to stop everything, go to that child and say the simple words, “I’m sorry. I really blew it, and I hope you will forgive me.”

Did this make us perfect parents? Not at all. But it did make us a little less imperfect.

We noticed almost immediate benefits from this approach. A gentle word really did turn away wrath. It had a soothing, calming effect on the children. It’s hard to stay mad at a parent who is willing to apologize. A sincere “I’m sorry” is one of the most disarming phrases one can utter.

Maybe this is part of what the Lord meant when he told fathers, “. . . do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord” (Ephesians 6:4, NIV).

Being willing to apologize also helped foster deep bonds and profound friendships with our now adult children. Over the years they have thanked us for being willing to admit our faults. But the greatest blessing has been to Bonnie and me. Today each of our four adult kids comes to Mom and me regularly to discuss their problems, dreams, and relationships. Sometimes their nakedly open honesty leaves us dismayed. They confess their sins to us and ask for prayer and guidance.

Apologizing quickly goes far beyond the parent/child relationship. As Christians, we need to be ready to admit guilt and apologize whenever the Spirit prompts us. We talk about mistakes we make in the Retooled and Refueled Seminar. When we make errors, it’s wise to step up and make things right — before someone demands it. “If you enter your place of worship and, about to make an offering, you suddenly remember a grudge a friend has against you, abandon your offering, leave immediately, go to this friend and make things right. Then and only then, come back and work things out with God” (Matthew 5:23b-24, The Message).

Nope, I can’t promise that this neat little formula will always make for a happy-clappy, problem-free, no-fuss-no-muss life. But if you model honesty, vulnerability, and a confessional heart, don’t be surprised if you see the same reflected back to you one day. Isn’t life too short not to give it a try?

But I disagree with people who say that no one should own a credit card. To blame credit cards for our spending problems is a little bit like going into the Burger King, coming out looking like a Whooper, and then blaming them for the problem!  The usage of a credit card has more to do with self discipline and personal control than anything else. Frankly, I believe that credit cards can actually be helpful in a number of ways:

• If your credit card is stolen and used fraudulently, you’ll likely have fewer problems retrieving the loss than you would if your cash was stolen. In many cases, your liability is limited to $50 per card.
• Some credit cards extend the product warranties.
• Credit cards offer a good way to manage your money.
• Many credit cards offer neat benefits like cash back, airline miles and other premium services. Of course, these “benefit” cards also tend to have higher interest rates and slightly higher annual charges. But, for people who follow what I teach in our No Debt No Sweat! book and seminars, the interest rate aren’t a problem—because we don’t carry a balance! And, as far as the annual fees, it’s simply a matter of running the numbers and making certain that the rewards outweigh the costs.
• If you have a dispute with a merchant, your credit card company may be able to assist to resolve your issue with that merchant.

But there should be a skull and crossbones warning here, too. While they’re promoted as plastic prosperity, credit cards are plastic explosives for millions of Americans. I would agree that some of us shouldn’t even touch them. I believe there are four things that anyone using a credit card should do:

1. Never buy anything with a credit card that you wouldn’t buy with cash. If you don’t have money in the bank to pay for it, don’t buy it. Studies show that people often spend 12–40 percent more when they’re using plastic!

2. Have a “Love Number” with your spouse. Agree with your spouse beforehand on a maximum amount you can spend with the credit card—and don’t exceed it without first talking to each other and agreeing that it makes sense.

3. Pay every single penny every single month. If you notice a couple of months passing with an unpaid balance, it’s time to pay it off or get rid of the card!  Never, never, never carry a balance! It’s a witch’s brew for trouble.

Nothing that I say here is meant to sound harsh. But having met with, and wept with, people all over the country who have been caught up in the credit card trap, I am convinced that only disciplined individuals should use credit cards. Many people are better using checks, cash and debit cards.

When you boil it down to basics, there are two ways to have more money. (Actually, I suppose there is a third, but it involves using a mask and gun—probably not a good plan.) Seriously though, I still remember a meeting with our business’s accounting firm many years ago. I suppose the monthly numbers hadn’t been great and probably without thinking, I stupidly asked my accountant, “What do we need to do?” Before I could retrieve that idiotic question, my accountant said, “Earn more or spend less.”

It’s still true. That’s how the people who get ahead—get ahead. But, today, thrift is a forgotten art. Maybe it’s because we’re too many generations removed from the Great Depression when people didn’t know where their next meal was coming from. We think it’s bad today when we can’t afford a new Apple computer. In the 1930s, people were just trying to afford an apple for dinner!

My father grew up in the Great Depression, and after World War II, he and my mother married. After a few years as a teacher, my dad became convinced that he needed to do his own thing. So he began an insurance firm that became very successful. My father always dressed in a coat and tie. We lived in a modern house with all the niceties of life, but I can still remember my father picking up pennies when he walked down a sidewalk. (On a related note, I was told that someone has calculated that it would be a waste for Bill Gates to stop and pick up a $100 bill, because the $100 would be worth less than the few seconds it would take him to retrieve it!)

Practically applied, thrift means we watch our money carefully. Remember, if you don’t care enough about your money to keep an eye on it, someone else who wants it more than you do will watch it (and take it away)! This means we must aggressively look for ways to cut our cost of living. Sometimes it’s simply a matter of being thoughtful: turning off lights when we leave the room, setting the thermostat lower and wearing a jacket, planning our errands so we avoid needless driving, and so forth.

But more and more in our self-indulgent, got-to-look-cool culture, this will require that we depart from the pack. It means doing stuff our friends won’t do. It means refilling our water bottle from a filtered tap at home rather than spending two dollars for one of those hip brands at the store. It means reusing our cups. (Did you know that if your bring your own cup, many convenience marts will let you refill it for up to 50 percent less than the cost of buying a new cup?) It means clipping coupons. It means buying our kids’ clothes at the next-to-new shops. (They’ll outgrow them before they outwear them anyway.) It means selecting a car for transportation rather than to impress people you don’t know!

This isn’t a bad way to live life. Many families have learned that it’s fun to gather the kids and brainstorm ways to cut costs and save money. And, besides, what a great legacy to leave!

One of the things that bugs me the most (I’m not proud to confess this) is that sometimes I become angry at people and events that interrupt my schedule. Whether it’s an email from Bonnie asking me to run an unexpected errand; or someone with a broken car who obviously needs my help; or one of the kids who wants to re-talk something that we’ve already discussed nineteen times—I am frequently disappointed by my lack of patience.

I still don’t have this demon conquered, but over the years God has helped me face this problem—and make some headway. The single most important turning point for me came one day when I approached Dr. Jerry Jones, one of my mentors, to discuss an issue I was dealing with. Jerry is one of the busiest, highest octane guys I know. He travels, writes, speaks, and teaches nationwide. Thousands of people seek his counsel on spiritual and marital issues. He is constantly being pulled by one person, then the next, for his time and attention. So I began my conversation slowly and hesitantly by saying, “Jerry, I hate to pester you because I know you’re extremely busy . . . .”

That was the last word out of my mouth before I saw his face turn from friendly to almost angry. Jerry looked me squarely in the eye and said, “Steve, don’t ever say a thing like that to me again! I am never too busy to spend time with you.”

Whew! Was I supposed to feel better—or scared? Jerry went on, “My job is to be like our Lord. Jesus ran a ministry of interruptions. He frequently started to do one thing only to be interrupted by someone who needed his time more immediately.”

Frankly, I don’t even remember what I wanted to discuss with Jerry on that particular day. But in the years since, I’ve played and re-played Jerry’s words in my mind a number of times: “Jesus ran a ministry of interruptions.”  The more I’ve pondered it, the more truth I saw in it.

Over the years since that day it has occurred to me how often Jesus began doing one thing only to be interrupted and end up doing something else. Jesus always seemed to live in the moment. Over and over, his plans were preempted. Do you remember the day that he got an urgent message from an important religious leader asking him to come and heal his dying daughter? Immediately Jesus began to follow Jairus to his home. No doubt this was a high-profile event. Likely there were thousands of people following. This was Jesus’ chance to heal an important Jewish leader’s child and become more popular than ever in the better social circles. If Jesus had had a publicist, he would have advised, “Stay on task Jesus—keep moving. You want everyone to see you perform this miracle.”

But things didn’t work out as planned. On his way to Jairus’ house, a common woman with an uncontrolled hemorrhage reached out for healing. Jesus could simply have ignored her and rushed on. But that wasn’t the Jesus style. Instead, he stopped and spent time becoming acquainted with this otherwise unremarkable woman.

This was not the exception in Jesus’ life—it was the norm. Even when things were at their worst, Jesus still kept his periscope up—always ready to respond to the immediate needs around him. I don’t operate that way. The more stressful my situation becomes, the less likely I am to pay attention to others who need my help. I want to be more like Jesus.

Luke tells how Jesus started to Jerusalem fully aware that, when he arrived, his enemies would murder him on a cross. To prepare his followers, Jesus said, “We are going up to Jerusalem, and everything that is written by the prophets about the Son of Man will be fulfilled. He will be handed over to the Gentiles. They will mock him, insult him, spit on him, flog him and kill him” (18:31-32, niv).

Now if this had been me, I would have been so focused on my own problems that I wouldn’t have noticed anyone else’s pain. But not Jesus. On his own death march, Jesus stopped and healed a blind beggar. Then, a few miles down the road, he stopped long enough to change the life of a short, corrupt tax collector named Zaccheus. This little guy had spent his career enriching himself by ripping off his fellow Jews. But thanks to Jesus’ willingness to be interrupted, Zaccheus found hope, forgiveness, and morphed from a taker into a giver.

Even when Jesus was moments from his own arrest, he still took time to heal the ear of one of his captors who would aid and abet his crucifixion. We humans tend to miss the big picture in two ways. One, when we mistakenly think that what is most important to us is also what is most important to God. And two, when we adopt the attitude that says “it’s my time.”

Remember, as Christians we have given it all up for God. Whether it’s our money or our music, our talents or our toasters—it’s all God’s stuff. The basic concept of biblical stewardship means realizing that God owns everything, including our time. Remembering this is why Jesus never missed the big picture.

The point here is simple: If you and I want to have true peace and joy we must pattern our lives after the one who brings peace and joy. I know that this is counter intuitive stuff. This is not the way most of our friends think.

According to the media, we get ahead by putting ourselves first. Most awards are given to self-promoters. But in God’s economy (the only one that will survive into eternity), it has much more to do with how available and ready we are when God “interrupts” our day.

A little strategy that has helped me to cope with — and actually anticipate — change involves renaming it. Marketing people have long understood the importance of words. For instance, we no longer have “used cars.” Now they are “pre-owned automobiles.” And instead of TV reruns, my summertime shows are now called “encore presentations.” It’s the same with change.

Maybe a different name would also bring a new vantage point. So, instead of calling something a change, we could call it what it actually is: A life passage. This morning as I begin writing this, I am preparing for a life passage — I think. At 11:30, I’m due to meet with Kevin for lunch. Our daughter Emilee and her boyfriend Kevin have been dating for some time now. Bonnie and I have expected what I believe is going to happen today. Kevin came to my office the other day and asked for this lunch meeting. Immediately, I gulped emotionally and said, “Sure. When and where?”

Frankly, I didn’t care when and where — I was mostly preparing myself for the “what” of the meeting. You see, I think Kevin is going to ask me for permission to marry Emilee.

Now there are several ways I can deal with this. I can become possessive and resist the entire notion. This would be a certain way to insure Emilee’s eternal love for her dad. Yeah, right! Or I could wax emotional and relive the early years when we called Emilee “Porcupine” (back then, her now long, beautiful hair, stuck straight out like a porcupine). Or maybe I could approach this with all the joy and optimism it deserves and realize that this is simply another life passage.

The reason I prefer this phrase instead of the word “change” is because it denotes the possibility of a new and beautiful vista — something I’ve never seen or experienced before. This is the optimism with which I believe God wants his children to approach life.

Why does the announcement of a new office manager scare you? Probably because you’re worried she’ll be worse than the last one. Why are you uncomfortable with the thought of having to move? Maybe because you assume that you’ll lose old friends — and never replace them with new ones. Why would a parent be a bit apprehensive about a daughter getting married? Assuming the beau is as cool and godly as Kevin, only because things in the future won’t be like they were in the past.

This is where “what if?” thinking begins to shine. What if that new office manager sees your talents in a light her predecessor never did — and promotes you? What if your move leads to a new circle of friends whose depth and relational skills exceed anything you’ve ever before experienced? And won’t those trips back for long weekends with your old friends be neat? And what if Kevin becomes wealthy and decides to buy Bonnie and me a home in Palm Beach? Well, that may be a little over the top, but you get my drift. There have been so many times after fighting and clawing to stave off a change — which is unavoidable anyway — I was stunned at how much better things became.

In my experience, attitudes tend to become self-fulfilling prophesies. I still remember the old story of a man who was sitting in front of a general store. An out-of-towner pulled his car up, stopped, and said, “I’m thinking of moving here. What sort of people live in this town?”

Without stopping his whittling, the first man simply inquired, “Tell me about the people where you come from.” The traveler grumbled, “Oh, they were the worst! I never found a single person in that town who liked me.”

“Those are exactly the kind of folks who live here,” came the native’s reply. “I’d recommend that you look somewhere else to homestead.”

A short while later, another weary traveler pulled into town. He, too, saw the man in front of the store and asked the same question about the people of the town. Again, the local inquired about the traveler’s previous relationships in his last hometown.

“Man, they were the best! Everyone in town was kind and ready to be a friend,” he bragged, “I hated to leave.” Came the reply, “Friend, you’re going to love it here too; let me introduce you around as soon as you’re settled.”

I wonder what would happen if “what if ” thinking replaced the fear of change. Do you suppose God would reward our faith and optimism with more peace, less stress and greater eventual joy? Jesus said it himself, “As a man thinks — so is he.”

p.s. I’m back from lunch. It looks like we’re going to get a new son out of the deal. I can’t wait!

In Scripture we see Satan as he really is—the great accuser of God’s children. This is how he is depicted in the book of Job when he accuses Job of doing his good deeds for selfish purposes. The devil pulls the same trick again in Zechariah 3:l:

“Then he showed me Joshua the high priest standing before the angel of the LORD, and Satan standing at his right side to accuse him. The LORD said to Satan, ‘The LORD rebukes you, Satan! The LORD, who has chosen Jerusalem, rebukes you!’”

The name Satan is closely akin to the Hebrew word, Satan’el, which means “accuser.” This is Satan’s stock-in-trade. He is the celestial prosecutor who never forgets our sins and mistakes. Every time I fall down spiritually and try to get up again, it’s Satan who whispers, “Steve, you know who you are. Maybe you’ve fooled these people and they think you’re spiritual, but we know better don’t we? Don’t you remember the TV show we watched the other night when no one else was looking? Don’t you remember that guy whom you vainly flattered to get a better price? And how about those thoughts you had when that young, blond crossed her legs at the party?”

It’s only when we accept the reality of God’s grace and peaceful forgiveness that we will be equipped (or even motivated) to change and improve. Many of us feed on the guilt of past mistakes and, in the process, miss a better future. Forgiveness comes when we repent and ask for it. And after forgiveness happens, any further worry is simply wasted effort. It comes from the devil himself. God’s righteous conviction results in godly improvement—and a realization that, as Paul says, “…one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 3:13b-14; NASB)

When all your past mistakes accomplish is an ongoing sense of worry, dread, and a lifestyle of inactivity, you can bet that those emotions are not from God. The truth is, God is pulling for you. The Psalmist says, “This I know: God is on my side!” (Psalms 56:6) God is the one who wants you to turn off the tube, get off the couch, put away the chips, and get busy for him! Specifically in the context of dealing with our money, that means we’re not going to allow past dumb money mistakes be our excuse for future dumb money mistakes. It’s time to fearlessly get up and get going! To paraphrase the late Coach Bear Bryant: The road to success is dotted with too many parking spaces.It’s time to get the car out of park and into gear.

The truth is: Anyone with enough gray matter between his ears to crawl out of bed, brush his teeth, and drive to work also has enough smarts to get out of debt and get ahead. It’s a matter of learning some basic (pronounced, s-i-m-p-l-e) strategies, then determining that you’re sick and tired of business as usual!

In my book, No Debt No Sweat!, I was able to go into much greater depth than space permits here. As a shameless plug for that book, I would strongly recommend any reader who has an interest in his or her money (whether you’re struggling with debt; trying to get ahead; wanting to learn the basics of sane investing; interested in developing healthy giving patterns; or teaching your children about money) get a copy. Or, if you prefer, read some of Dave Ramsey’s or Larry Burkett’s materials. There are a host of Christian writers who have squarely taken on the subject of Christians and how they handle (sometimes, mishandle) their money. Become a reader. Then develop your own action plan—and put it into action. Here’s the great news: When we get our priorities right, the rest of our lives will pretty well dove-tail together. Tomorrow is the beginning of the rest of your live. Get busy!

There are three lessons that might turn this predicament into a fruitful learning and growing opportunity.

James, put a high premium on wisdom. (see James 1:5)  Today, there seems to be confusion between wisdom and knowledge. They both have their place — but they are not synonymous. Knowledge is what tells us that a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is what tells us not to put a tomato into a fruit salad.

Today’s world has plenty of knowledge but a dearth of wisdom. The smart people of today’s financial world have had their turn at things, and now we are in trouble. Maybe it’s time to rethink the fundamental tenets of our beliefs. Wisdom speaks to this. It says whenever someone gets something for nothing, there will eventually be a disproportionate price to be paid.

Solomon, King David’s number one son, was fond of saying, “There is nothing new under the sun.” It seems to me that there is nothing “new” about our contemporary culture. While I would agree that the names and players are different, the root cause is the same. It pivots on the three things that John warned the early Christians to guard against, “For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the boastful pride of life, is not from the Father, but is from the world.” (1 John 2:16)

We would serve ourselves well to remember that the best financial teaching is in the Bible. I call it “Money 101.” It comes from a man who knew how to live with and without prosperity. Paul shared with his young protégé Timothy the secret to dealing with money in 1 Timothy 6:17-19:

“Command those who are rich in this present world not to be arrogant nor to put their hope in wealth, which is so uncertain, but to put their hope in God, who richly provides us with everything for our enjoyment. Command them to do good, to be rich in good deeds, and to be generous and willing to share.”

Note the three things Paul tells rich Christians to do. (By the way, if you have a bathtub in your home—comparatively speaking—you’re a rich Christian.)

1. Don’t be prideful and arrogant. Wealth doesn’t make one person better than another.

2. Don’t put your trust in your 401(k) plan. As we’ve all seen, dollars in the bank do not guarantee anything.

3. Enjoy your wealth, but be ready to share it at the drop of a hat.

You may be thinking, “That was fine in the day of well-drawn water and one-room houses with no electrical outlets, but it is far too simplistic for our modern, complex world.”

I disagree. Paul’s words from the ancient world are every bit as relevant as the headline on the Wall Street Journalsitting next to my computer. His teaching drills to the very core of who we are and how we think. It gets back to what I mentioned a moment ago: appreciating the difference between knowing (knowledge) a lot about wealth and being wise enough (wisdom) to use our wealth properly.

The Cold, Hard Facts

Today it’s possible (and actually probable) that a young person will go through twelve years of school and four years of college—supposedly being taught what they need to know to be an educated, productive member of the culture—without ever being shown how to balance a checkbook, do a budget or avoid a bad credit card deal! In my years of teaching on money, I’ve marveled at how some of the most educated people out there (i.e. doctors, politicos, lawyers, etc.) are often dummies when it comes to their finances.

The facts should give us all pause:

• Personal bankruptcy is a huge problem in America. In recent times, there have often been about 1.5 million bankruptcies yearly. In some years, we have had more bankruptcies than undergraduate college graduates. Think about that: More bankruptcy decrees than college degrees!

• Presently the average household debt in America, not counting mortgage debt, is roughly $15,000. But, remember, that’s only an average. When you factor in the number of people who live responsible lives with no debt, this means that many others are in a world of hurt. I counsel people regularly whose short-term debts exceed their annual income.

• Americans are presently carrying over one trillion dollars of credit card debt. Many people think nothing of buying this week’s groceries on a credit card and paying for them over the next twenty or thirty years. It has been estimated that, depending on terms and interest rates, if you’re are carrying a credit card balance of $4,000 and are paying only the monthly minimum, in many cases it may take more than twenty years to get rid of that debt!

• The average fifty-year-old has less than $40,000 of total wealth, including his or her home. (To have any real hope of stockpiling $1,000,000 by retirement time, that fifty-year-old will need to start saving at least $25,000 every year until the gold watch. And even that may not be enough to hit the goal!)

• With card debt having tripled since 1990, today the average family is carrying about $10,000 in outstanding credit card debt. Nationwide, there is roughly one trillion dollars of credit card debt.

• Although many students leave college with more than $20,000 in loan debt (that doesn’t count the credit card and car loan debt), many depart the ivy halls without a job. So they become convinced that the solution is more education, which leads to even more debt. Eventually, with multiple sheepskins in hand, they hit the hard, cruel world only to realize that their chosen major doesn’t produce jobs that pay enough to allow them to aggressively kill their student loan debt. They spend their adulthood trying to catch up—constantly fussing with their spouses and unable to relax with their children. Twenty years later, they have nothing saved for their kids’ college or their retirement.

• As of 2009, there was about twelve trillion dollars in outstanding mortgage debt, which represents roughly fifty million home loans. Since 2007, millions of Americans have lost homes because of terrible loan products they bought into between the late 1990s and 2007.

• My experience convinces me that more than 70 percent of all Americans are in financial pain—living from paycheck to paycheck. And that number is growing.  Many people who always considered themselves middle-class citizens made bad decisions that, today, are costing them dearly.

Predictably, there is a lot of finger-pointing.  It’s always easy to blame the bank or the mortgage company when we have too many bills and not enough money.  But the fact is: Everyone is at fault! I blame everyone.

The government is at fault for aiding and abetting, the lenders for lying, the real estate sellers for their greed, and the rating agencies for turning a blind eye.  But most of all—I blame us!  Sometimes, instead of blaming others for my problems, I need to take a close look in the mirror and admit that I really didn’t read the loan documents (or get an attorney’s help). I simply wanted what I wanted—so I signed on the “X” because the deal sounded “so good.”

Today is the day to stop listening to Wall Street, Madison Avenue, and Hollywood—and begin paying more attention to Peter, James, and John!  As Christians we must develop a worldview that is different from those around us who honestly do believe that whoever dies with the most toys wins.

Much of Christian borrowing happens because of three bad things:

1) Often we don’t trust that God will truly provide all our needs. So we try to help Him along by borrowing money to buy stuff that clutters our financial and spiritual lives.

2) Sometimes there’s an element of greed. Remember, Jesus told us that we cannot serve two masters.  We can’t serve both God and money.  But, you say, “I don’t!”  Are you sure?  When we’re being driven by the payment book, we can’t sleep at night, and we’re fussing with our spouse—one could make the case that money is controlling our lives.

And, lastly, there is another all too human trait involved in our borrowing.

3) Too often we borrow money to buy stuff we don’t need to impress people we don’t even know.  It’s called EGO—arguably the most expensive and costly thing we will ever have!

In the next several articles, we’ll examine ways to buck these trends and become better stewards of the resources God gave us.

As you read this, the financial markets may be shooting toward the moon, or they may be in the tank. Historically, stock market investments go up roughly 70 percent of the time. Over the last 100 years, stocks have gained value in most every ten-year period, including during the Great Depression.

The question laid squarely at our feet is how will we respond to the tempests in the teapots of our lives in view of eternity? What if tough times caused Christians to again become the salt that Jesus directed us to be? What if we, again, led by example? What if we bought fewer “extras?” What if we paid off our credit cards and purchased only cars we could afford? What if we saved more than we spent? What if we always had money to give to others and were truly ready unto every good deed? What if we got serious about being all we could be as God’s witnesses before the world?

“Dear friends, I urge you, as aliens and strangers in the world, to abstain from sinful desires, which war against your soul. Live such good lives among the pagans that, though they accuse you of doing wrong, they may see your good deeds and glorify God on the day he visits us.” (2 Peter 2: 11-13, NIV)

Three Reasons Why People Who Are In Debt, Stay In Debt

As I write this, I’m on a plane returning home to Nashville from a No Debt No Sweat! Christian Money Management Seminar that we concluded last night in Montana. The church was filled with sweet, godly people. But many of them were struggling with their money. I was especially touched by a couple of situations where the people felt hopeless. I’ve learned several things through the years as I’ve taught the seminar around the country, and one of those lessons is that people who are in debt stay in debt for three reasons:

1. They feel hopeless. In truth, they are usually not hopeless. Most people who follow what we teach in our seminars can get out of personal debt (not counting their homes) in a one- to four-year period. Granted, there are huge benefits to starting this process early rather than later in life. But if you’re already in your late forties, fifties, or older, it’s not too late. There are people who start savings plans in their seventies and still see helpful results. Remember, it’s never too late to start doing the right thing. (By the way, in addition to the financial implications in that comment, there are also some profound theological implications. The God we serve is not only the God of the second chance—He’s the God of the ten thousandth chance, too!)

2. They feel all alone. This is where Satan does his best work—he convinces a person that he is the only one with the problem. So, naturally, he’s embarrassed and tries to hide it by putting on his mask and pretending like everything is okay. Yet, inside, he’s dying. His spiritual vigor is gone. He’s fighting with his spouse. He doesn’t have time for the kids. He can’t sleep at night. He’s depressed.

The truth is if you’re in debt, you’re not alone. As I’ve mentioned earlier, I’m convinced the majority of Americans are only one paycheck away from trouble. It’s been estimated that many of us are spending 20 percent of our income paying off short-term, high-interest rate debt.

And as long as the devil keeps us convinced that we’re the only person hurting—he wins!

I’ve about decided that the devil is nothing more than a roach. Have you ever gone into a dark room, turned on a light and seen a roach in the middle of the floor? What does it do the second the light hits it? That’s right—it runs for cover! Dear reader, the devil is a roach. When we begin to shine the light of Jesus on him, he scrams! What we need to do as Christians is develop the “koininia-style” fellowship that the Bible tells us to develop. We need to become each others’ best friends and confessional partners. When we start to talk openly with each other, things change. Church is much more than sitting for an hour looking at the bald head in front of you! It should be the place where we develop our closest friends and confidants.

But to be painfully pointed here, the church is sometimes its own worst enemy. In many churches, “that sort of thing just isn’t done,” some Christians might say. After all, if we’re God’s kids, aren’t we supposed to have our acts together? Sure, we can admit to some of the socially acceptable sins: “I wish I didn’t lose my temper so easily” or “I spend too much time at the office and not enough at home with the kids.” But that’s where we draw the line. After all, many of us are “people of the mask.” When we come into the church building, our neckties are straight, our dresses are in fashion—and our lives had better appear to match up. Maybe it’s time to shine the light of Jesus on that old roach!

When we become involved and invested in one another—and start telling the truth—we’ll begin to open up. Some of you guys need to begin a weekly men’s prayer breakfast so you can cultivate this kind of atmosphere. Some of you ladies need to get gut honest in your prayer circles. Some of you husbands and wives need to invite another couple over, pop some corn, and start the conversation. And if you don’t know what to say, try something like: “I’m sitting bolt-upright in bed at three o’clock in the morning scared about my debts;” or “My wife and I are at each others’ throats;” or “I haven’t given anything at church in six months.”

I believe if you try a stunt like that you’ll be surprised at how the conversation will flourish. And you know what the really neat thing is? There’s a high probability that the other people will breathe a sigh of relief and say, “Me too!”

3. They feel dumb. It’s amazing how often when I’m talking to people about their debts, they’ll stop and look at me and say, “I feel so stupid” or “I’m such an idiot.”

Here’s the fact: Being in debt and being dumb are two entirely different things! Sadly, it’s possible to be totally out of debt and still be a dumb person! But, seriously, the opposite is also true. It’s possible to be in debt and not be dumb at all! I could share a number of stories with you of people I’ve known who were smart business leaders but got themselves into terrible debt troubles.

Granted, most of our debt dilemmas are the result of dumb decisions. But making a dumb decision and being a dumb person are two totally different things!

But, remember, good things usually take time. And that is certainly the case when it comes to developing your PFFP. It may take three to six months before the various categories of your plan begin to work in harmony. You will have to put more in some categories, and take money out of others. Like a master craftsman you’ll gradually fine-tune your PFFP into a highly accurate, customized document. (Remember, as far as I’m concerned, it’s not a budget if it’s not in writing!) But if you stick to it, gradually you will develop an invaluable worksheet that serves as your financial map to a more predictable and secure future.

Six Tricks of the Trade

Let me share six ideas that will give you a real “leg up” as you develop and implement your family’s PFFP.

1) Devote your effort to God in prayer, and make at least a six-month commitment. It takes time and effort to change bad habits. As you launch into this new lifestyle realize that there is a spiritual battle going on. At present, the devil has you exactly where he wants you—frustrated, worried, at odds with your mate. Bring this new approach to controlling your money before God and give it to Him. Make up your mind not to become discouraged—not to turn back. Make a personal commitment to stay the course for at least six months. This will give you the needed time to get past the first few months of confusion. Also, it will give you time to begin enjoying the benefits of your new lifestyle.

2) Balance your checkbook every month! Nothing mucks up a financial management plan quicker than an out-of-balance checkbook. Developing a PFFP while your checkbook is out of balance is like trying to win a triathlon with an anchor tied to your waist.

3) Develop an “Agreement Purchase Amount” with your spouse. Happy marriages are marriages that have good communication. I have recently been working with a couple in a mid-western state whose finances are in terrible condition primarily because of the wife’s uncontrolled spending habits. Without her husband’s consent (and in some cases, even his knowledge), she has racked up over $30,000 in short-term debts—including a new car! I’m happy to tell you that, thanks to a lot of prayer, some good Christian counseling, and a lot of patience on the husband’s part, their marriage is on the mend. But the debt problems are probably going to require at least five years to repair.

I like to encourage couples to agree on a maximum amount of money that either partner can spend without the consent of the other. The amount will vary based on your age, maturity level, and financial capabilities. For instance, if you’re young newlyweds with very limited incomes, you might decide that any purchase over $20 requires mutual agreement. However, a wealthy, middle-aged couple might agree that it’s okay if one buys a car without notifying the other.

4) Avoid the “Impulse Market Mentality.” It’s amazing how many budgets get blown out of the proverbial water because of what I call the “Impulse Market Mentality.” This is the temptation to run into a quick market and grab a snack and a soft drink—or some other impulse item. This is a special temptation to folks who spend a lot of time in their cars, like salesmen. No, I’m not against snacks and soft drinks—but I am against throwing away $100-$200 monthly! Think about it. If you run into a quick market just two times a day—that’s sixty stops per month. And, if each time you buy a drink and a candy bar for $2.00—that totals $120 in the course of a month! That’s $1,440 per year!

5) Use ATM’s cautiously. ATM’s are great—I use them myself. But you need to remember at least three things: First, ATM usage makes record keeping more difficult. It’s easy to make an ATM withdrawal and forget to stub your checkbook. A few oversights like this can lead to an overdraft charge from the bank that resembles a payment on the national debt!

Second, avoid using your credit card at ATM’s because it is so easy to over-withdraw. One study showed that while the average ATM card withdrawal is $53, the average credit card withdrawal is over $120!

Third, when you do use your ATM card—try to use it at your own bank. When you use your card at another bank’s ATM, most of the time there will be additional charges.

6) Consider destroying any credit card that you don’t pay off in full each month. I know that carrying a credit card balance is almost an American institution. But if you are ever going to get out of debt and stop letting your money manage you, a good starting place is with your credit cards. I’ll have more to say about this later, but for now, suffice it to say that credit card debt has proven to be a real financial killer for many families.

In what we call the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus laid out a beautifully balanced plan for this life—and the one to come. In Matthew 7: 13, we read Jesus saying, “Enter by the narrow gate; for the gate is wide, and the way is broad that leads to destruction, and many are those who enter by it.” Now, a fair exegesis of this passage would clearly tell us that Jesus had far deeper, more profound things in mind than credit cards. But, His words here are very applicable to my point. The credit card culture of modern America is fraught with spiritually debilitating quicksand.

The fact is: Credit card companies don’t want you to pay the full balance on time because it doesn’t net them enough profit. As a matter of fact, if you pay off your entire balance every month, they call you a “credit card deadbeat.” That’s right, in the parlance of the credit card industry, a consumer who pays off her full balance on time every month is a “deadbeat!”

So to remedy this problem, credit card companies’ contracts have become more and more complex. I’m told that, on average, credit card contracts are now over thirty pages long! And, boy, they are tough.

You might suppose that since I speak more than 200 times annually to Christians about their money, I would somehow be immune to this problem. But I’ve had disputes with my own credit card company twice in recent months. At least once, I caught them charging me a late fee—when I hadn’t been late.

Here’s a thought: Understand how your credit card works before you start using it. Don’t ever sign up for a credit card unless you’ve read (and understand) the terms of your agreement. And, like I mentioned, these agreements are getting tougher and tougher. I recently heard of a Harvard Law School class that tried to dissect a credit card offer one of them had received. After spending most of the class session reading, re-reading, and discussing the contract’s terms—theythought they understood it, but they weren’t entirely sure. My point here is: if a class of well-educated legal eagles have to struggle to understand a basic credit card contract that should be a clue to us that the credit card companies may not want us to fully understand everything. Some of the things that are creeping into more and more credit card contracts are:

“Universal default” phrases. These allow issuers to raise rates even if you pay that creditor on time, but are late paying another creditor (i.e. another credit card company or utility bill.)

Cards with “two cycle billing.” This is a provision that allows an issuer to calculate your interest rate by reviewing your average daily balance over the last two months, not just one over one month. Some experts say this can cause many people to pay more than they otherwise would have to.

Phrases like the terms can change “at any time for any reason.”

Teaser rates. Look for a card that won’t change your rate until after its initial term expires – frequently after two years. But watch out, even with this provision, a late payment or an over-the-limit purchase may trigger higher rates and fees.

Find out how picky your company is. Some companies hit you with a higher rate and fees even if your check arrives on the due date—if it’s past the time of day marked on your bill.

Beware of easy payment provisions. Find out if you will be charged extra if you pay your bill over the phone

Always mail early—very early.

Don’t hesitate to call and dispute (as nicely as possible) anything that isn’t right. And do it ASAP!

I you identify with any of these scenarios then what do you say we do a little “check up from the neck up”—okay?

I recently heard someone ask, “Should I go into deeper debt on my credit cards—so my kids can have a good Christmas?” In my opinion, the emphatic answer to this question is NO! The question itself needs to be rethought. First, what is a “good Christmas?” I’ll revisit this in a few moments, but for now suffice it to say, it is a huge mistake to communicate to our children that a “good Christmas” equates to the number of dollars we spend. In many cases, whatever short term “fun” that might come spending money we don’t have for Christmas—will be lost in the pain that follows. By pain, I’m thinking about the arguments the kids will overhear when those plastic bills start to arrive. And, in more dire cases, critical things that may be lost or curtailed long after the “must-have” Christmas toys are lying under the bed collecting dust. What happens when those credit card bills start filling the mail box in late January? What will be lost? Maybe the money needed to pay tuition, or for new shoes, or even to keep the mortgage current.

Actually a lean Christmas can be a long term blessing for our children. What would be wrong with simply telling them the truth? You don’t have to go into all the gory details. But what if you sat down and said something like, “Children, this Christmas is going to be special—but not in the way you might expect. This year Mom and I have to make some really tough decisions. We would like to have enough money to buy lots of gifts. But we don’t. We do have plenty of money to pay for what we need: the house, our food and cloths. But not if we spend that money buying lots of expensive gifts. So this year we’re going to have a special Christmas. We are going to find neat ways to remember Jesus.”

With that as your Yuletide intro, turn it into a game. Ask your children (depending on their ages) to do “Jesus things” this Christmas. Why not decorate the house with hand-drawn pictures of the Nativity? Why not write and share poems or short stories about how Jesus’ birth changed the world? Why not focus on how poor Jesus was—and how, comparatively, wealthy we are? On that point, why not discuss the poverty that most of the world’s citizens experience their entire lives?

Then, let’s put our words into action. Let’s do Christmas differently this year. Why not turn off the TV and spend evenings preparing for a refreshingly different Christmas? Following are some ideas you might want to consider:

1. Make home-made gifts. If you crochet why not make ornaments and starch them for your friends’ trees. Or, can your favorite foods. (And don’t tell me you can’t afford to do this. These don’t have to be expensive fruits and nuts. One of our friends at church gives us a small jar of homemade pickles every Christmas. They probably cost her less than a dollar—but I love those pickles!) There are a million ways to do this. Just find one or two that work for you—and get the family busy.

2. One store-bought gift per kid. Tell each child that this year they will get one “special gift” (and, give them an idea of your budget for that gift). Then, stick to your guns. Go into the store with a list—and don’t fall into the trap of buying “just one more little thing.”

3. Give “Time” Gifts. Over the years I’ve encouraged people to give “time” gifts. Nothing is more special or more personal. In our family we frequently give homemade coupon packets redeemable for things like a 15-minute foot massages or 30-minute backrubs. Why not design some cool-looking gift certificates on a computer for your friends and family? You could give a young family a gift certificate redeemable for “one evening of free babysitting.”

4. Look for ways to give to others. No lesson you’ll ever teach your children will be more valuable than this one. Show them, by example, how to bless others. Why not take some of your limited funds and make a meal for someone less fortunate. This gift-giving experience will be one that your children will remember throughout their lives. They will always remember the Christmas when “Mom and Dad were short on money, but we made a meal (or, cookies—or, whatever) for the family who lived in the shack outside of town.” Or, what about simply making P&J sandwiches and giving them to the homeless?

5. To enhance the appearance of gifts under the tree on Christmas morning, why not include some essentials? For instance, if you know you’re going to have to buy underwear or new shoes in the near future, go ahead and get them now. Wrap them and put them under the tree. (No, the kids won’t like them as well as toys, but they will enhance and prolong the Christmas experience.) By the way, to save money on expensive Christmas wrapping paper, why not use the Sunday comics from the newspaper?

At the top of this article I told you that I wanted to explain what I mean by a “good Christmas.” As I get older, things are becoming clearer. For me a “good Christmas” has precious little to do with how much loot I get. And, I believe we do our children a serious injustice by training them to define a “good Christmas” that way. I know that this is anti-cultural. And, yes, I’m fully aware that the world has a different perspective on this. But, as Christians, are we not called to be a “peculiar people?” If we have the gumption to teach our children proper perspectives when they’re young, doesn’t it stand to reason that when “they are old, they will not depart” from those perspectives?

Our kids are going into a tough, anti-God world. Don’t we do them a favor by teaching tough principles while there are still young? Frankly, I’m convinced that the hope for this country will be a generation of children who will grow up with a Godly world-view. And, who will not bow the knee to a culture that tries to ignore our God. Merry Christmas.

Without question it makes logical sense that a Christian’s first and primary commitment should be to the fellowship of which she is a part. Each year I travel to about fifty churches presenting the No Debt No Sweat! Christian Money Management Seminar. Frequently we do the seminar on Sunday — I even preach at a lot of the churches. But do you know what I don’t usually do? I don’t usually contribute when the baskets are passed.

“Aren’t you the guy who teaches about Godly money management and giving? What a hypocrite!” you might think.

No, I’m not being a hypocrite. As a matter-of-fact, I’m doing exactly what I teach. You see, I save my contribution until I’m back home and can give it to my home church. After all, it’s my home congregation that relies on me. Those are the people who depend on me — they need and deserves my support.

So, if you are one who excuses not giving your contribution to your home church because you “just don’t agree with how they spend the money,” then something needs to change. Either it’s time to find another congregation that is more in line with the truth, or maybe it’s time to do a check-up-from-the-neck-up of your own commitment level.

With all of that said, let me put a little different spin on the subject. As I’ve mentioned in the past, I fear anything that turns an act of love and charity into an act of obligation and legalism. As an active member of the Antioch Church of Christ in Nashville, I know what our budgetary needs are. And, generally speaking, I’m pretty much aware of whether we are meeting those needs or not. At times when we are falling short, our family gives a little more than normal. When we are meeting and exceeding the budget needs, I feel more comfortable giving some of my money to other efforts.

So, while my first obligation is to my church, I try to keep my eyes wide open to other opportunities the Lord shows me from day to day. I don’t want to be like the priest and the Levite who (likely on their way to church services) couldn’t find the time to show compassion to the man along the road who had been robbed and beaten. (See Luke 10:30.)

One thing that appeals to me about Jesus is the way He moved and walked freely in the Spirit — always ready unto every good work. I want to see the poor people that God puts before me. After all, more than twenty of the Hebrew Psalms center on God’s love and care for the poor. John, one of Jesus’ closest Apostles, summed it up this way in 1 John 3:17: “But whoever has the world’s goods, and beholds his brother in need and closes his heart against him, how does the love of God abide in him?”

But it’s not just the poor in need of our help. What about the missionary you may know who has barely enough to keep body and soul together? What about the young lady who would go to school to become a third world doctor — but doesn’t have the funds? What about the flood victims who lost their homes? What about the fledgling radio ministry that reaches into China? Or, what about the mom who just needs a bag of groceries to get her kids through another week?

So, remember to “check in with God” on a regular basis. Pray over where your funds are needed most. This Christmas season is the perfect time to ask God to open your eyes to special needs in the world, and to perhaps give a little more than usual. Keep your home church as a top priority, but be open to helping others. Sure we can legalize our giving — but isn’t it more fun when we don’t?

Let me share a few things to consider before selecting a gift card this season:

1. Unlike the old-fashioned gift certificates, gift cards may leave you with a wasted balance. Do you remember the old gift certificate that your grandmother gave you for $20 for merchandize at the toy store? If you bought something for $18, they gave you the remaining $2 back in change. But, with a $20 gift card it doesn’t usually work that way. If you spend $18 of its value you’re simply left with a $2 credit. Many of these $2 credits never get spent — thus leaving retailers millions of dollars in “free” money. Or, consider this scenario: you find yourself trying to “use up” the remaining $2 by buying something for $8 that you really don’t need.

2. Beware of bankrupt retailers. As the economy worsens, many retailers will close their stores. If you get a gift card from a retailer that closes, you’ll most likely be out of luck. There aren’t a lot of laws protecting consumers in this area. If you are given a gift card, consider using it quickly. The week after Christmas is usually a great time to find bargains. For a list of retailers to avoid purchasing gift cards from, check out Ellie Kay’s recent article Gift Card Warning!

3. Some gift cards have expiration dates. Even if a store is not going out of business, some gift cards may expire after a certain date. While many store cards do not have expiration dates, according to Bankrate.com you may find that the Visa or Master Card you give expires within a year or two. And some may begin charging a monthly service fee after a year or two, which leads into point #4…

4. Some gift cards charge fees. Once again, many store cards don’t. But often the Visa, Master Card, and Mall cards do. These fees (frequently $3-$5 per card) can add up in a hurry.

5. Think about giving gift cards for essentials. So you still want to give gift cards for Christmas? With more people losing their jobs, consider giving “practical” gift cards. Give a gift card for groceries, gas, or even to help pay utilities.